A poem

Nightmares, nightmares, go away
or I will kill you dead!

Revised from a poem by Jessica who revised it from the classic, "Rain, rain, go away."

Giving blood

So my year finally ended and I was able to give blood! Huzzay! BJ has the most ridiculously large veins, so I decided they were made to give blood. Thus, Saturday I made him go with me. (He's a good sport.) Turns out that his ginormous veins aren't really all that better for giving blood. Or perhaps it was just a fluke? Anyway, by the end, the guy taking his blood had to stay there and hold the needle still, else the blood would stop flowing. By that afternoon he had a giant bubble full of blood on his elbow. (He was warned it'd look like a gigantic blood blister that he couldn't pop.) Well, the blister finally went down, but now he has this giant bruise on his elbow. We tried to get a good picture of it, but this was the best we could get. So now you can see the comparison of his wounded elbow compared to mine. See? You can't even see the hole from the needle on mine. (At least not in the picture. You can see it in real life.)

But seriously. Isn't that bruise huge?

One step at a time

In an attempt to legalize my music, I've been going through my iTunes and categorizing music by Mine and Not Mine. (I have collected my fair share of roommates' music throughout the years.) Tonight I started deleting music that wasn't mine and that I didn't care enough about to actually purchase. This was rather difficult. Although I don't like them enough to buy them, they are songs I still liked enough to listen to. But... I did it. Here are the stats:

Deleted songs: 1,034
Songs I want to buy (so I didn't delete): 721
Songs I own: 781

So I've still got a ways to go, but I think I made a really good start today. Perhaps now they'll all fit on my iPod again. Now it's a matter of talking myself into purchasing music that I already have on my computer. It's just harder, y'know? I'm putting out money but getting nothing in return except peace of mind. But I'm convinced that it'll be worth it. I look forward to the day that I can say that all of my music legally belongs to me.

Wedding Photos Available! (For a limited time!)

It's now been nearly three months since our wedding, so I suppose it's time to actually share photos with people. Tianna's brother Travis took hundreds of great pictures for us, so distributing them has been somewhat of a challenge.

But never fear! Challenges are meant to be conquered! We figured most of you wouldn't want or need a DVD of our pictures, so we found a better solution. We've posted all of the photos online, so you can browse them at your leisure and download all the photos you'd like. These are all the full-size images, direct from Travis, so you can take them to be printed if you really like us that much. Or, if you're one of those special few who love us so much that you want every last one of them, talk to us and we'll figure things out.

We're not posting the link to the pictures here, since we'd rather not be featured on Google Images, but if you want access, just e-mail me (bjhomer@gmail.com) and I'll send you the link. The photos will only be available for a couple weeks, (since I want the space back eventually,) so act now! Call in the next 10 minutes for your free... oh wait. Nevermind.

It's easy! We promise!

A final farewell

Well, we did it. We sold my car. I never thought I'd say this... but I miss her. She raised quite a fuss after I bought her from Damian (apparently she liked him... go figure). She and I did not get along. Then, after we decided to sell her and I stopped driving her, I realized how much I really did like her. Now, whether it was the car I liked, or the fact that I could plug my iPod directly into the radio, we'll never know. I did like how fast the A/C turned on, though... Anyway, point is, she is sold. And life is happy. (Yay! No more car payments!)

Thank you James and Julie for giving Charlita a new home!

Waiting for the perfect moment

I promised Tianna a number of months ago that if we got a blog together, I'd write in it. Avid readers will have noticed that I haven't done so well. In fact, that's probably why we have no avid readers. But now, I'm here. For a while, my excuse has been that the blog wasn't "ready." It was just black text on a white background, as I hadn't gotten around to stylizing it yet. But now it's all pretty and such. (Really, if you're reading this through Google Reader, you should look at the background. I spent at least two hours playing with it.)

In truth, though, I have a tendency to do this. To put things off until the "right" moment, as if somehow magically things will change without my own action. It rarely happens. My grandfather was fond of saying that "Things that don't change tend to remain the same," and I think it's wise advice.

So this is me. Changing. Expect to see me around more from now on.

Lessons from the 3 Nephites

BJ and I were talking about the three Nephites today when, in typical BJ fashion, he exclaimed excitedly, "But, like, Tianna! They're real!" We talked for a long time about the logistics of the three Nephites being real. We speculated about if they own a house somewhere, or perhaps they live in a cave in a desert that only transfigured/translated/etc. people can go. (I pointed out that if only people who are transfigured/translated/etc. people can go there, it'd probably be a little nicer than a cave in a desert.) We speculated about logistics like if they pay taxes or have an SSN. What if they didn't live in the US? When do they say their birthday is? 12 BC? Do they have an equivalent of an Obliviate charm?

Once the obligatory speculation session winded down a bit, we started into actual spiritual and doctrinal discussion. Not that everything we discussed is official Church doctrine, but it was at least discussed with a serious air, with the Spirit joining our discussion. After a while of discussing what they might be doing and how John the Beloved was also on the earth doing the same thing, BJ very humbly asked, "Could I do that? Like, if I wanted to stay on earth with them, could I?"

I thought this was a remarkably insightful question. Could we, like those four faithful men of old, choose to stay on the earth and serve and bring others to Christ instead of dying? There are many story lines based around the things people will do in order to keep from dying. This sounds very much like that. The Angel of Death is at your door and as he's pulling you through you shout, "Wait! No! I don't want to die! I'll make you a deal. If I can stay on earth, I will serve and bring people to Christ for the rest of my life!" Lame. Serving others is not a bargaining tool; it is not something you do as a last ditch effort to save yourself. The three Nephites and John were not looking for a way to escape death, rather they looked upon death as an end to their service, which was a fate worse than death. The thought of not being to able to serve their brethren and share the gospel of Christ was too much for them, so they begged to stay.

The question then is, are we living that way now? Are we striving to share the gospel and serve our fellowmen? When we die, if we ask to stay and serve, God will know the intents of our hearts. If we're asking in order to postpone death, we're asking for the wrong reasons. Rather, God would look at our entire lifestyle to see if spreading the gospel and serving others is something we are already doing.

BJ and I both agreed that it's that lifestyle we should be striving for... not because we want to ask God if we can stay on the earth forever, but because that is the kind of people we both want to become. Sounds simple enough, right? But to be very honest, sharing the gospel is a very scary thing for me. It's not something I've had a lot of opportunity to do. I've lived in Mormonville, Idaho or Utah my entire life. When I've lived in other countries, they're countries that I have solemnly agreed not to share the gospel in. I simply have never been given an easy opportunity to speak openly about the gospel to non-members; I don't know many non-members. Having no experience in this area, I am far from my comfort zone. When BJ suggested that we pray for missionary experiences daily, I actually shuddered. Don't get me wrong; I want to share the gospel and bring others to Christ... but can't I do it just as I am currently doing it? Can't I just be an example and share my testimony in Church? Can't I have gospel discussions when the topic is laid at my feet? Must I really actively search out opportunities? The thought is truly frightening to me. (Part of me doesn't want to write this because it means that I am openly admitting one of my weaknesses to the world, but I feel that the only way I can grow is to be honest with myself and with the world; it doesn't do anyone any good if I pretend to be someone I am not.)

There is one key point that I never give enough credit. I truly believe that God can do anything. I do not, however, have enough faith in myself. The point I forget? That God has the power to help me do anything that He wants me to do. Thus, instead of praying for missionary experiences daily, I am going to start praying for the courage to accept missionary experiences. I am going to pray to become willing to seek out those opportunities. I don't have to have the faith and courage of John the Beloved right now. But I do need to take a step in that direction. These are my baby steps. Thankfully, God looketh upon the heart.

One last thing on this already-too-long post. While in Jerusalem, my friend, Rebecca, commented to me that if missionary work is bringing souls to Christ, then any time we do anything to bring someone, member or not, closer to Christ, we have been missionaries. If posting this blog serves only as an outlet to focus my thoughts to bring myself closer to Christ, I have succeeded in my goal today.